New moon, eclipse....words that used to be associated with nerdy science kids on astronomy excursions, but which now dominate the lingo of 13 year old girls (ok, ok and some of the rest of us to)’s vocabulary. By now you should also have picked: Team Jacob or Team Edward (psssh….like there is any competition. Taylor Laudner may have a face like a brick door, but he’s sassy and has arms like a rugby player). Oh no…I’m one of them, aren’t I?
There is a fabulous quote about the movie, namely that it is the ‘classic tale of a teenage girl’s choice between bestiality and necrophilia’. Harsh, but brings a snigger to the chin. In any case, I joined a steaming herd of social animals last night at the movie house to be a part of watching the final of the trilogy (the books formed a trilogy until she brought out a fourth book, which is referred to as the ‘sequel’ to the saga. Um…what?)
I’ve watched both of the first two, and since I am on holiday of late and have re-watched Ever After (yes, I am that bored), I decided that these two hours aren’t EXACTLY going to waste. I managed to drag the boy too (!) I’m not here to give a movie review, you’re either going to watch it or you aren’t, and no amount of pretentious ‘well-the-cinematography-is-good’ crap is going to change your mind.
I’m here for a
spoiler-alert
shocker – after all this debate and uncertainty and indecision, she decides to become a vampire! Is this writer delusional? Surely all vampire movies are supposed to end with the hero(ine) deciding that no matter how glamorous and delightful and adventurous and exciting the life of a vampire may be, ultimately they are the Cold Ones, the Undead, the Frozen, the whatever, and then choose life?
Those are the RULES!
Everyone knows that. Tuck Everlasting, Interview with a Vampire, Blade…all of these movies showed us that our humanity and our mortality are some of the most precious gifts we have and the point is not to live happily ever after, but to live.
Someone should sue the pants off of her for not sticking to protocol.
Despite how WRONG she got it, she somehow got it so RIGHT! If she gets sued (and she should) everyone else who has fallen for her trickery and poured cash into her well of lies, should get someind of kick in the @$$ too!! Waddaya say??
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