Having a 5-year old around the house sure keeps things interesting. I guess as adults we take a lot of things for granted, in our speech, our understanding and the content of our conversation. It can occasionally take a small questioning voice to put a fresh spin on things. And no, before you shake you head and roll your eyes, this is not my version of “Kids say the darndest things”, but rather an account of how kids can really put things into perspective.
Because of the kind of upbringing I have had, and the parents I have, the ideal for a future partner is one long, lasting romance. Marriage is not a debate, and the plan was to meet my sweetheart and stay happily in love forever. Sadly, we don’t live in the past and life is very different for us these days. With modern dating comes all the complications of finding out a person you have invested years with is not the one for you, and looking sadly into their eyes for the last time, while your world crushes around you. The heartache and upheaval that comes from any break-up can be bad enough, but we at least to a certain extent understand it and some of the finality it brings.
My little brother asked me the other day “What is an ex-girlfriend?” He is not in any doubt about what girlfriends and boyfriends are, having 5 older siblings have made that a lot easier to accept. But then this question raised the concept of an ‘ex’ girlfriend. I explained to him, with as PG detail as a 5-year old needs what it means to break up and why it happens. I painted a picture using all my siblings significant others as a pinpoints to try and make it understandable to him. He looked a little bemused and said “Oh, I just thought you had a lot of boyfriends!” In his mind I guess they had never become exes, but remained part of the landscape that made me. And well, he is right. While they didn’t turn out to be my life partner or the person I maybe wanted them so hard to be, they certainly shaped the person I am today and are as much a part of my past as they are a part of my present.
Of course, it didn’t end there. He sniffed somewhat dismissively after my explanation, turned away and said, with a superior tone, “Well, I have had the same girlfriend my WHOLE life!” Sigh, yes you have my boy. Good luck with that…
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